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Electronic voice.

Overhead at Southbank today:

Girl 1: I hate Dannii Minogue. And Kyle Sandilands. And...and...that other judge.
Girl 2: Brian McFadden?
Girl 1: Yeah! Brian McFadden! I HATE HIM SO MUCH!
Girl 2: Yeah...
Girl 1: I HATE that song of his. He's a terrible singer. He has an electronic voice for crying out loud!
Girl 2: Um...
Overheard in a book shop:

"Girl: I wont read anything that isn't twilight because i know it won't be as good. "

Heaven in Brisbane?

Overheard at the big pedestrian crossing on the corner of Adelaide and Edward.

Little boy (about 5yo): There's too many people here!
Grandma: *nods*
Little boy: Are we in heaven?
Grandma (absently): No, we're not in heaven.
Little boy (sounding wistful and confused): But there are so many people...
Excited geeky guy: [blah, blah, blah]...Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.
Girl: I don't know who that is.
Excited geeky guy: He wrote the Adventures of Sherlock Holmes.
Girl: ...
Excited geeky guy: He also wrote The Lost World.
Girl: Oh, you mean Jurassic Park?
Excited geeky guy: ....No. Not Jurassic Park.


Not smoking?

Overheard behind me in a lecture theatre:

Guy 1: I thought you quit smoking.

Guy 2: I did! I don't smoke during the day


2 overheard exchanges

In Coles at West End...

Mother: Ok, what else is on the shopping list?
Little girl: Friends.
Mother: What?
Little girl: Can we buy friends?
Mother: You don't buy friends.
Little girl: Daddy says you can.
Mother: Daddy says a lot of things.

And on the 109 bus...

Girl 1: (whispering loudly to Girl 2) I don't know how they work!
Girl 2: I don't know either. Ask someone!
Girl 1: (to passenger across the aisle) Excuse me. How do buses... work. Like, what do I do to make it stop when I want it to stop?
Passenger: Just press the button.
Girl 1: What button?
Passenger: That one. (Points to one of the many bright red buttons)
Girl 1: That's a BUTTON?! (She sounds like her world has just been rocked to its foundations)
Passenger: Yes...
Girl 1: So if I press that thing, the bus stops?
Passenger: Yeah, it'll stop at the next bus stop.
Girl 1: Really? Really?
Passenger: Yeah...
Girl 1: (to Girl 2) We just have to press this thing, I think it's a button!
Girl 2: Really? And the bus will stop? Wow.

They successfully got off the bus at South Bank.

We're American.

On Sunday night, we were leaving Friday's (shuttup, don't ask) when 2 random tourists yelled at us:
Girl 1: "Hey, you! Take our photo; we're from the States!"
Me: "Yeah, sure"
Girl 1: "We're American, we don't know anything!"
*friends and I crack up laughing*
Girl 2: "Yeah, we're so ignorant"

The latter was less drunk and I think appreciated the humour of the situation. Not to mention they were asking me, an early twenties gay guy, where the hot, straight, 30-something men could be found... on a Sunday night.

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A bunch of high school students were on the train, having a standard high school student conversation, then...

Girl 1: (suddenly yelling) Why the fuck should I know what a flamingo is?!
Girl 2: What? You don't know what a flamingo is?
Girl 1: No! I'm not a bogan!
Girl 2: Why would a bogan know what a flamingo is?
Girl 1: Because bogans sit around studying animals and nature and shit! Fuck, I don't know!

On the Cleveland train...

Teenage boy: I go to a Lutheran school and we have 45 minutes of chapel every day so we learn heaps about our religion, and we have religious education classes as well as chapel. Lutheran is basically better than all the other religions.
Little girl: What's Lutheran?
Teenage boy: Well, we're different from the other religions because we have pastors instead of priests. And... what else do we have? Umm... yeah... I don't know. But we have pastors instead of priests, which makes everything a lot more... good.
Little girl: (looks out the window) Wow this train is fast.

Ahh, religion.